I'm at 40 days now. That is not long at all. I still feel like I have so much to do. To be prepared to go through the temple, read and study Preach My Gospel, read and study The Book of Mormon and try to possibly go all the way through again before I leave. FIND CLOTHES!!! And still questioning luggage choices.
It can be stressful. Those are just some things. Physical matters.
But sometimes... I just feel a little freaked out. As you read through this post, always keep in mind, I am beyond excited to serve a mission. Some days I just feel lonely and I am afraid of what to do for the people I am leaving behind. I feel guilty that I am not gonna be there when they may need me. Sometimes I feel somewhat the other way around. What I am gonna do when I want them then and there ... which won't happen while on the mission. I'll be there in Mexico and they'll be here, my home sweet home and surrounding areas.
Being at work (for one more week), instead of school right now I feel especially out of the loop of how everyone's doing because I see my friends and family once, maybe, twice a week. I know this is nothing, as I will prepare to be apart with what I know and love for 18 months of my life.
I was feeling especially so on Tuesday. Tuesday night is institute night. I was at one end of the room at one point, and across the room I saw a friend of mine smile and wave at me. It was so nice! After Institute on Tuesday nights, there are freshly baked cookies baked by the senior missionary couple. She was up in the room with me and I told her "I see people!!!, which basically meant that I actually saw friends. We talked for a little and she gave me a hug. She probably didn't know how much I needed that hug that night.
I know I am going to have more hard days leading up to, and on my mission. When that happens, there is one thing that I should always remember. I am never alone. Never. Neither are you, as a matter of fact. We have our Heavenly Father with us. Always. To quote a good friend of mine, speaking of my mission "You won't be all by yourself! The Lord will be with you all the time." What a wonderful thought.
Friday, January 24, 2014
I apologize for my lack of posts as of late. I will try to keep up.
It was a great first lesson, and I wrote a few things down in my book that I learned. I participated in discussions quite a few times and loved hearing so many of the different insights that people had to say.
Nearing the end of the class, Brother Eaton asked to think of what we learned and what we were taught by the Holy Ghost. For everyone in the room, the instruction was the same. We all heard the same words. When people shared their answers of what they were taught, there were quite a variety of answers.
Though I know already, it really emphasized how the Lord knows each of our needs and the things we need to learn to help become better people. Since that lesson, I really try to act upon what I was taught that day. I definitely know it will help me on my mission. To forget about myself and go to work.
Saturday, January 4, 2014
Today marks 60 days. Tomorrow marks 2 months. In the words of my friend "it sounds so long but it's really not". I still feel like I have so much to do. It's a little bit crazy, but alas, I am still here.
A week for two after I received my call, I was at Gospel Principles class. The brother who was teaching us this class was asking who our favourite biblical missionaries were. Some answers were Abinidi, Paul or Jesus Christ himself. Mine? Let me take you back about 7 months from now.
In my scriptures I was reading about Alma the Younger and the sons of Mosiah who once were rebelling and telling people to stray from the church but then after the angel came down on them, they became converted. I was reading the chapters in which they are on missions and teaching people like the Anti-Nephi-Lehi's. Here is something I wrote in my journal.
" It doesn't really say it word for word - but these men were on missions. They could
have chosen to stay where they did all their lives. But they didn't. They went out to lands where they've never been, residing with people and loving, and saving them, and teaching them about the gospel. Such selfless people!"
That was the night I knew I needed to serve a mission. It was an amazing to feel that Heavenly Father needed me somewhere else to be teaching the gospel.
Guess what my answer was.